Warning for shrieking brainweasels

Me on literally any other day within recent memory: Wow, I have made some errors today! Oh well, everyone has off days, and my excellent track record with Aveline easily outweighs today's hiccups. I will email her so she knows the situation, apologize to the victims of said errors, and make reparations as necessary.

Today: I should throw myself into the river behind the office, I am clearly useless and feckless and hopeless, why does anyone even bother with me? You don't even get candy tonight--you idiot, you shouldn't even eat, you haven't earned it, fucking everything up--

The rest of my brain: ...okay, that's going even more hardcore than the usual anxiety...

*checks calendar* Ah, yes. Time for the monthly surfeit of self-hate. I think I'd rather have cramps and bloating, tbh.